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FANTASIA SPEAKS: "I Just Wanted Out!"

Fantasia is finally speaking out in her own words.  The 26-year-old states that her overdose a few weeks ago was no accident, and she "just wanted out."

 

More deets on her first interview since her suicide attempt when your read on...

Fanny did an interview with VH1's Behind the Music (airing 9 p.m. ET/PT tomorrow--the same day her album Back To Me drops).  And she opened up about her recent suicide attempt and wanting to die.  She talks about her overdose being no accident, and how she attempted suicide so she could have a way out:

"I didn't have any fight in me. I didn't care about anything. I just wanted out.  At that moment, I wanted out. I wanted it to be over with – all of it, all of that [expletive]."

"I just sat in the closet and looked at the mirror and took all the pills in the bottle. I wanted to go to sleep and just be at peace. I knew exactly what I was doing. You can't accidentally take a whole bottle of pills."

"I was tired of people doing me wrong, constantly, over and over again, dealing with my family – my father, dealing with men and their [expletive] – I was tired. "My head was hurting me. I was over it."

Her manager Brian talked about what Fantasia texted him right before, and how he found her:

"Her emotions were extremely low.  She'd been crying all day. Fantasia was just numb. Fantasia texted me, saying 'I love you.' I wrote back, 'I love you more.' Then it hit me."

"I wrote, 'You better not do anything or think about doing anything stupid.' And I left it at that. About 10 minutes later, Fantasia texted me back, and she said, 'Already did.' I went into Fantasia's room and saw her on the floor, and my heart just dropped."

Fantasia went on to talk about her thoughts when she "realized" Antwaun Cook, her lover, was still married, and her thoughts once she awoke in the hospital the day after her attempt:

"When I met him, he was separated ... wasn't living in his home. He didn't want to be back with his wife – that is what I was told," Barrino says. "I remember waking up in the hospital [and thinking], 'It didn't work, I'm still here in this hellhole. Still here with all this drama going on.' "

"My nurse Melanie was a blessing into my life because she didn't tell me what I wanted to hear," she says. "She told me what I needed to hear. And she looked at me and said, 'You gotta get up, and you've gotta get out of here, 'cause you haven't fulfilled your destiny.' "

"I realized how people end up in the grave. Because that one moment [snaps her fingers] of just breaking or feeling like I can't, I can't go on, it's too heavy. That was somewhere I don't ever want to go again."

Sounds like her attempt was her rock bottom and rude awakening.  I'm sure we'll see it all play out on the new season of her reality show "Fantasia For Real".  In case you missed it, check out these pics of her and Antwaun having a "meeting" the day after she got out of the hospital...cameras in tow.

Source

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Comments

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In real life...real folk

In real life...real folk would have been locked up in a psyhc ward until they realized that you were ready to face the world without harming yourself. I don't want to pass any judgment on Tasia, but this all seems a bit interesting to me. I would prefer this to be a publicity stunt and not real life because any parent, who is raising a child alone, should NEVER be selfish enough to want out. What about the child(ren)? I've heard the voices in my head to end it, but the first person I thought about was my son. His father is already dead...why would I put him through that again? Come one people, wake up!!! What about the children???????
Anonymous's picture

People that try to commit

People that try to commit suicide don't automatically get sent to psych wards. I KNOW THIS FOR A FACT because I had a family member try to commit suicide a few months ago. She also took a bunch of pills and nearly succeeded at killing herself. It was horrible!! Guess what, the hospital staff made her better and she was able to go home…which was the very next day. The medical hospital has a psych department/social workers/whoever that come to you and talk to about your suicide attempt. If they determine that you are able to leave and you won't hurt yourself, you can go home…and I'm assuming that's exactly what happened with Fantasia. Most people on these blogs have no idea what they are talking about...just a bunch of speculating.
Anonymous's picture

Amen!

Amen!
Anonymous's picture

you clearly don't know what

you clearly don't know what you are talking about. I worked many years as a social worker. I don't have just one example of how this plays out, I have many. Stop with the excuses for Fantasia. Enabling her in her nonsense doesn't help it hurts.
yuk's picture

She didnt even think of her

She didnt even think of her child. What a stupid bitch.
Dez's picture

For those of you running to

For those of you running to Fantasia's rescue, how do you explain why this confession is put out just a day before her cd drops? How do explain why Fantasia was not forced to stay in the hospital which is mandatory for people who commit suicide? How do you explain F antasia taking the pills and right after texting her manager with nothing in the text telling him to tell her daughter she loves her or asking for someone to make sure she is ok? Making excuses for this broad does not help the situation, it only hinders her. If her fans really care, they would stand by her but send the message that what she has done is clearly unacceptable whether it is to sell records or because she can't handle the situation she brought on herself.
yuk's picture

"Forcing" people to stay in

"Forcing" people to stay in the hospital is not "mandatory" for people who try to commit suicide. Those people also don't automatically get sent to psych wards. I KNOW THIS FOR A FACT because I had a family member try to commit suicide a few months ago. She also took a bunch of pills and nearly succeeded at killing herself. It was horrible!! Guess what, the hospital staff made her better and she was able to go home…which was the very next day. The medical hospital has a psych department/social workers/whoever that come to you and talk to about your suicide attempt. If they determine that you are able to leave and you won't hurt yourself, you can go home…and I'm assuming that's exactly what happened with Fantasia. Most people on these blogs have no idea what they are talking about.
Anonymous's picture

First of all I am not buying

First of all I am not buying your story. If she almost succeeded at her attempt she would have really been sick. After pumping her stomach she would have been held for observation for her physical health and mental. Either that hospital needs to be closed or someone is feeding you some bull. I worked in social services for many years and worked with psych staff and know this is not how it goes down.
yuk's picture

All this over sum damn dyck?

All this over sum damn dyck? You barely know a muhphuka to begin with. I could see if you put in the damn time the wife did with the kids and all that...and then...to see him coming out the hospital?? That's giving a negro too much power honey! I've been w/ my man for 21 years...I'll be damned to take a bottle of pills cuz he got an itch that needs scratchin! I hate weak minded chicks!
Lockstress's picture

That's what I'm sayin, she

That's what I'm sayin, she did all this over someone else's husband! How stupid can you be? Then she's still fuckin with him the day she gets out of the hospital...unbelievable. I've been with my husband for 16 years and I wouldn't even think about killing myself cause of some shit he's taking me through. I'd cut his ass to the white meat but harm myself, never.
rated_X_33's picture

As usual, the so-called

As usual, the so-called CHRISTIANS/CHURCH FOLKS are the ones passing the MOST judgement on Fantasia! I believe in GOD myself and I try on a daily basis to live according to HIS WORD. Whether it was staged or a real suicide attempt, it's obvious that she needs to get HELP for herself and her child. JUDGE NOT, LESS YE BE JUDGED is what my bible says. Instead of praying for her and her child most people have used this situation to talk about how ugly they think she is or to call her WH*ORES, B*TCHES and every other name in the book! SHE MADE A MISTAKE, SHE SCREWED UP( just like we all have), give her a FREAKING break, D*MN! The way some of you have come down on this troubled young woman is really SAD and you better hope and pray that you NEVER SCREW UP; because the way YOU judge someone else is the way GOD is going to judge YOU! REAL CHRISTIANS/GODLY people don't TEAR DOWN others and call them out of their names, they show LOVE and COMPASSION, remember that next time you HYPOCRITES decide to quote SCRIPTURES. That wasn't a sermon, that's just the way I feel and I practice it everyday.
DeeDee's picture

AMEN Dee Dee! Thank you! I

AMEN Dee Dee! Thank you! I know this is a "gossip" site but gee-wiz! You would think these folks were God himself! Why do we continue to tear one another down, mistakes or no mistakes. Folks are either too black, too ugly, too thin, too thick, too big, too small, too much weave, too this or that! I'm over this site and the negativity! And for anyone that says anything about me being "over it!"...Get over yourselves! No one forces me to read this "gossip" site but I do because I can. Look in the mirror...no one is perfect, so give it a rest! That is all...
PrettyBrownGirl's picture

AGREE 100%

AGREE 100%
YadaYadaYada's picture

PREACH!!! I totally agree

PREACH!!! I totally agree with you!
Anonymous's picture

Fantasia, you have a child.

Fantasia, you have a child. Whether this is real or staged, your child will one day see that you publically claimed to have attempted suicide over a man. How could you?
Anonymous's picture

I was thinking the exact same

I was thinking the exact same thing. I know she has a lot of stress in he life. With a family like hers that is clearly trying to ride he ass all the way to the finish line and now this married man scandal still should not be a greater reason the try and abandon her daughter on this earth. In fact knowing she would be leaving her daughter with the likes of Teenie and em should be motivation to suck air into her lungs everyday. Whatever her reasoning real or fake she needs to get her life together. She is her daughter's greatest role model and her behavior as of late is not a good look.
truth hurts's picture

when she was thinking of

when she was thinking of commiting suicide WAS SHE CONSIDERING HER CHILD?!?!/ #SELFISHBITCH
Anonymous's picture

All this over a nigga!

All this over a nigga!
Anonymous's picture

I feel bad for her, getting

I feel bad for her, getting to that point. I and noone else has to walk in her shoes on a day to day basis. The tabloids will ruin people's lives. She needs some privacy to deal with this. Not condoning her behavior but she really does not owe anyone an explanation for her actions. I wish her the best, she is a talented singer and I will leave it at that. People are judgmental enough, I will not be.. I wish her all the best!
Foxxy Brown's picture

If she wanted any privacy,

If she wanted any privacy, her and her team wouldn't be coming out with statements every week. She also wouldn't showcasing this personal issue on her upcoming reality show. This was all done for publicity and she is milking the life out of it. She doesn't want privacy she wants publicity and FAME!
Anonymous's picture

OK so...she going through all

OK so...she going through all this...she got a album coming out tomorrow and a new show...IDK sound like a publicity stunt to me...
Not Hatin, Just Sayin..'s picture

Really? Like, for real, for

Really? Like, for real, for real? Man, nobody in this day and age wants to accept the responsibility for their actions. I know everybody is different, but damn, Fantasia. Somebody has to have a sense of RESPECT about themselves to say, Antwaun if its TRUE you are separated and in the process of divorce from your wife. I have a child, a image, morals, reputation, and all that good stuff to uphold, so bro if you really want this nook, call me when the ink dries. I KNOW WOMEN WHO DO THAT NOW, and their not in Hollywood. Because, nine times out of ten, the men are LYING. Accept the fact, sista, you got this man and flaunted him in every magazine, buying motorcycles and shit, calling the wife even in your latest song flaunting the affair. You created this MESS, now you want out. Pathetic. If I sound mad, sista, I am. Im pissed at the fact you boast of your relationship with him. Now the wife and media is about to tear your ass apart you WANT OUT. You MOTHER FU@#$R,. Then, your stanken ass wasn’t seen with your daughter hugging her and telling her your sorry for BEING SELFISH and not thinking of her. YOU WERE IN THE PARK WITH ANTWAUN. Even in this above statement, you NOT ONCE mentioned your CHILD. Whether you care of not, brown and white babies love you, and this is not the IMAGE I want them to think blacks need to grow up to be like.
ProudBlackSista's picture

Really? Like, for real, for

Really? Like, for real, for real? Man, nobody in this day and age wants to accept the responsibility for their actions. I know everybody is different, but damn, Fantasia. Somebody has to have a sense of RESPECT about themselves to say, Antwaun if its TRUE you are separated and in the process of divorce from your wife. I have a child, a image, morals, reputation, and all that good stuff to uphold, so bro if you really want this nook, call me when the ink dries. I KNOW WOMEN WHO DO THAT NOW, and their not in Hollywood. Because, nine times out of ten, the men are LYING. Accept the fact, sista, you got this man and flaunted him in every magazine, buying motorcycles and shit, calling the wife even in your latest song flaunting the affair. You created this MESS, now you want out. Pathetic. If I sound mad, sista, I am. Im pissed at the fact you boast of your relationship with him. Now the wife and media is about to tear your ass apart you WANT OUT. You MOTHER FU@#$R,. Then, your stanken ass wasn’t seen with your daughter hugging her and telling her your sorry for BEING SELFISH and not thinking of her. YOU WERE IN THE PARK WITH ANTWAUN. Even in this above statement, you NOT ONCE mentioned your CHILD. Whether you care of not, brown and white babies love you, and this is not the IMAGE I want them to think blacks need to grow up to be like.
ProudBlackSista's picture

Oooh Co-sign, co-sign,

Oooh Co-sign, co-sign, co-signnnn!!!
Dime Diva's picture

All you'll bitches hating on

All you'll bitches hating on Fanny, you'll life is no better....How do you guys know she did not say her goodbyes to her daughter, stop judging peoples life, leave it up to the most high...Everyone is responsible for all their actions on judgment day, so stop hating and start preparing your hearts to me your maker...CHOOPS
Anonymous's picture

So if she said goodbye to her

So if she said goodbye to her daughter that made everything ok?
yuk's picture

You have a young child and

You have a young child and your gonna end your life over some guy your DATING.....really :/ As a mother I really don't understand this.....
Tracie J's picture

i wish all you ppl with these

i wish all you ppl with these long ass comments would stop judging fantasia. none of yall know the real story until she tells her side. everyone who is without sin, cast the first stone. who made you judge and jury!! and leave her daughter out of this. have a little respect!
Anonymous's picture

ugh cant stand her. i get a

ugh cant stand her. i get a faint smell of tuna when this story comes around and im just so sick of the antics w/ her. i d believe that God will not give u more than u can bare and for a woman of faith...she's ready to jump the boat bc a man lying is the LAST straw?! grow tha hell up. blaming ur circumstances is NOT growing...it's staying in them and she just needs a therapist, a Pastor & a prayer!
myMAMAsaid's picture

FINALLY speaking out? You

FINALLY speaking out? You were being sarcaastic right? Feels like she's been speaking out since the day she took those pills. She is loving this attention.
Anonymous's picture

The sad thing is that older

The sad thing is that older women would always support and nurture the young girls even if they made poor choices because made mistakes also. Know we don't have anyone to be caring and understanding. All we do is belittle each other. Everyone makes mistakes with men and relationships. People grow and mature over the years. We are doomed as young women because we don't support and pray for each other. All we do is hate. Stop the hate and playing GOD!
Anonymous's picture

if she thinks her life is

if she thinks her life is hard,she needs to look at what other celebrities went through,like michael jackson
Anonymous's picture

some people really cant

some people really cant handle life.i will always be a fan of fantasia's but she need to just shut up and sing,she dont owe anybody an explanation but her daughter...ill pray
Anonymous's picture

Dang, they way some of you

Dang, they way some of you "people go in on Fantasia, like y'all really know her personal business and what she is really going thru is amazing! "everybody wanna play GOD" stop judging, no one knows how FANTASIA felt but Fantasia or what was really told to her, or what she believe.
Anonymous's picture

Jennifer Hudson..come get

Jennifer Hudson..come get your girl..she needs you asap!!!
Miss Sinsai's picture

I was thinking the same

I was thinking the same thing!
Anonymous's picture

fanny is one pretty

fanny is one pretty latina............... i hope she gets it 2gether!!!!!!!
whodat's picture

I still don't believe her.

I still don't believe her. And quite honestly...I'm over her. I was fanny fan, and I don't hold what they do in their personal ives against an artist...but this one just don't sit too right with me. I believe she's using the he lied to me line...to not make herself look bad, but it is what is is. I can't get over how she was going to kill herself and leave her daughter like that....I mean wow. She needs to seek a therapist. Not run around on stage barefoot.
serene's picture

her manager? really???

her manager? really??? doesn't she have a daughter? she thought of her mgr and not her child?!!! if this was done to sell some damn songs she's got waaay bigger issues
Anonymous's picture

I am not buying this bullshyt

I am not buying this bullshyt at all. If Fantasia really tried to commit suicide, she would be on a mandatory 48 to 72 hour hold at the hospital to make sure she was was out of danger and not trying suicide again. She would more than likely be put on an antidepressant and certainly not be looking like Ms. Poppin Fresh. The fact that her issues brought her so low that she wasn't even thinking about her daughter should/would make anyone who gave a darn or wasn't faking take a serious break to get their life in order. They certainly wouldn't be rushing back into the spotlight to perform and confront their man, the reason for their emotional upset in the first place. If this is a publicity stunt, you get a "ho sit your a$$ down" for that. If you are just that trifling that you are just strung out over the ding ding, you need to go in hiding and get your priorities straight.
yuk's picture

Who the f*%# cares what you

Who the f*%# cares what you buy and don't buy..Fanny does not know you and does not give a rat ass what you buy...
Anonymous's picture

You obviously care what I buy

You obviously care what I buy or don't buy or you wouldn't have commented. Fantasia definitely cares what we buy or she wouldn't be putting out a promo confession a day before her cd drops. What's the matter boo? Truth smacked you in the face and got you irritated?
yuk's picture

I COULD NOT HAVE SAID IT

I COULD NOT HAVE SAID IT BETTER!!!! I COMPLETELY AGREE WITH EVERYTHING YOU'VE SAID HERE; AND THE WHOLE TEXTING BACK AND FORTH TO THE MANAGER SAYS ALL I NEED TO KNOW....DAMAGE CONTROL!
Leisah's picture

I think she should be charged

I think she should be charged with attempted murder and child neglect. This is just sad. She needs help, before she gets to that point again.
kimora Cochran 's picture

I AGREE! IF SHE HAD GOTTEN

I AGREE! IF SHE HAD GOTTEN HER WISH WHAT WOULDVE HAPPENED TO HER CHILD! OVER A MAN FORREAL! SMH
TISH's picture

She had been through alot,

She had been through alot, don't judge her, it was a weak moment she fell plenty of times and once again like before she'll rise.
Anonymous's picture

It is good to see Mos Def and

It is good to see Mos Def and Jeffrey Wright headed to Broadway again.
Anonymous's picture

I agree with many of the

I agree with many of the comments. I'm over her and her need for publicity. Its soo "ironic" that she's revealing all of this information because she has a CD coming out and that dumb @ss show. Really? You're gonna tell Vh1 your problems? YOU HAVE A DAUGHTER YOU DUMB@SS!! We condemn men for being bad fathers so often - its time we start calling out selfish a$$ mothers as well! ugh *goes to get coffee*
JMO's picture

I'm just glad she's better

I'm just glad she's better and talking about it.
A*J*'s picture

EXACTLY! This was just a cry

EXACTLY! This was just a cry for attention and help and to make herself "appear" the Victim. Fantasia just made bad decisions and she was not thinking. It happens. But let's be CLEAR. She did made very poor decisions but SHE did not break up ANY marriage. The person that Broke up HIS Marriage was MR. COOK. The Home Wrecker is Mr. Cook not Fantasia. People always want to attack the woman but Home Wrecker come in BOTH GENDERS. If Fantasia was married and she had an affair then she would be a Home Wrecker. But in this case the Home Wrecker is Mr. Cook and Mr. Cook ALONE. People should respect marriages and I think it's a SIN to sleep with a married person and yes you will pay for those actions 100% But the person MOST to blame in my view is the person who breaks the VOWS they took. Which is Mr. Cook. People need to be calling HIM the Home Wrecker. NOT Fantasia. I think Fantasia just made dumb choices. And she will pay for those she is paying for those. But Mr. Cook broke up his marriage and people need to be ANGRY with him.
FURIOUS STYLES  's picture

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