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TOO SOON!? When SHOULD A Single Mom Introduce Her Kids To Her New Man?


Over the holidays, Jennifer Lopez was spotted in Hawaii with her twins Max and Emme AND her new boy-toy, 24-year-old Casper Smart. Now that Casper is joining the whole family on trips, it has folks asking if she should have introduced her youngins to her new man so soon? Speak on it inside....

No one would expect a hot single mom to remain single forever.  But moving on just months after a divorce...with a backup dancer half your age...and you're introducing him to your kids 15 minutes later?  It does beg the question.

42-year-old Jennifer Lopez was spotted with her new boy toy of the moment, Casper Smart, in Hawaii this Thanksgiving.  And he was seen playing with her kids Max and Emme on the beach yesterday.  Given, he probably already knew the kids somewhat simply because Jenny probably brought them to work a time or two.  But....vacationing with them?  Hmmm...

Clearly "moving on" worked for Kimora Lee Simmons whose blended family is like the "standard" most would probably like if they were in that situation.

And introducing the kiddie early also worked for Halle Berry, whose new beau Olivier Martinez seems in awe of little Nahla. But still...some folks are questioning why J. Lo took her new man on holiday with her and the twins and other family members for Thanksgiving. How soon is too soon?

Relationship expert Sandy Weiner says it's hard to put a "time" on how soon is too soon, but adds that before you introduce someone into your kids life, it should be someone you are serious about and who is a "...steady presence in your life."

She also says,

In my opinion, a more casual relationship should be kept out of your kids’ lives. Period. Your children don’t need to form attachments to men who won’t stick around. If you have shared custody with your ex-spouse, there are plenty of opportunities to date when you’re not with your kids. I highly recommend beginning any relationship that way. The last thing your kids need, on top of the emotional turmoil of a divorce, is the complication of their involvement and attachment (or friction) with the new man in your life. If you are very serious about this relationship, you’re going to want to slowly integrate him into your children’s lives.

 

So what do you think?  Is it ok to introduce a brand new man into your kids life only MONTHS after you've left their father?  SPEAK ON IT.....

 

Comments

WANT YOUR OWN AVATAR? GET IT HERE.

It is too soon and you can

It is too soon and you can place a time frame on when you introduce your kids to the new man or woman in your life...especially a new man. I say that b/c so many girls are molested by family members including their own father, so to bring a new man into your kids life this early is asking for trouble. It doesn't matter how nice he seems. A father, cousin or uncle doesn't seem like the type to molest a family member but it happens (not to mention the priest, men of God). Take the time to get to know the man. I don't care how in awww (as u put it about Halle's man) a man is w/ a child. You never know and it's not really something you want to think about. Outside of molestation, some relationships don't last. Kids cling to people only to have them ripped out of their lives. J Lo could use some time to herself instead of jumping back into a relationship. Hopefully she'll seek some wisdom especially when dealing w/ her kids.
CoCo's picture

omg the people who say I DO

omg the people who say I DO NOT SEE A PROB WIT IT are the same ones who hav a bad past life or present abusive,or trouble life men and fem. bottom line and iam a YOUNG man sayin this it is way too soon. PERIOD j=lo not old yet early forties not old,so she can date a younger guy why not it is hot,but should NOT! have her and marc anthony kids around no guy yet any age. way too soon. she is stupid on that part.smart business lady stupid wit the kids. from CHINO RIVERA ON FACEBOOK PHILLY,PA NJ TRI STATE. NYC
Chino Rivera on FB's picture

O Please Jlo is the typical

O Please Jlo is the typical puerto rican hoe!!!!
Sallyone's picture

O Please Jlo is the typical

O Please Jlo is the typical puerto rican hoe!!!!
Sallyone's picture

Jlo erks me more than KK.

Jlo erks me more than KK.
Anonymous's picture

I USE TO LIKE JENNIFER BUT

I USE TO LIKE JENNIFER BUT NOT ANY MORE THIS WOMAN NEED HELP HOW MANY MAN SHE GONNO SLEEP WITH I THINK LESSON LEARN DON'T LET UR FAMILY TO PICK UP UR LOVER FOR U THEY TOLD HER WHAT KIND THE MEN SHE SHOULD MARRIED NOW SHE PAY BIG PRICE FOR IT.
yiss's picture

halle berry daughter so cute

halle berry daughter so cute she looks like a straight black child with long good hair lol
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Anonymous's picture

It's a personal issue when

It's a personal issue when ppl introduce their kid to boy/girl friend but I think it should be done when u feel that relationship is strong, lasting & moving to next step in life& family. But it that's ya boo and yall just kicking it until the next one than No , cuz how many "friends" will ur children meet in their life time.
Anonymous1's picture

I don't see a problem with

I don't see a problem with it. These kids may have known Smart for ages while Marc was out doing his thing. Remember, Marc is a repeat offender! You lose them how you get them...see his ex-wife Dionarra Torres for details. I think going to the beach with Mommy's friend/Uncle is aight.
Ms_Leo's picture

Whether you have children or

Whether you have children or not, everyone Has Been A Child and remembers what that childhood was like.....Good or Bad. I agree with an earlier commenter, this is about Jenny from the Block "jabbing" Marc Anthony in the gut. At 3 years old, are her kids old enough to remember? I would say yes. In recalling some of my earliest memories to this day, go back to 3 years old. I can remember them very distinctly. Will her children be scarred from this? I would say probably not, depending on how Jennifer conducts the relationship moving forward. However, I would hope in moving forward she would put greater emphasis on her children's needs Before trying to "stick it" to the Ex. (*Just my opinion*)
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Anonymous's picture

Come on you know why. What's

Come on you know why. What's worse for a man to see his kids playing with another man? Only time we see these kids are when thier w/mommy in public. J-lo and Halle B are playing games w/their ex's.
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Anonymous's picture

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The power of the young dick.....alllll-right
wak548's picture

If this were Marc Anthony

If this were Marc Anthony instead of J-Lo would people be so critical? I'm not saying she's right because when you have children, especially small children, you need to be very selective about who they are around. But I do think that if this were a man introducing his kids to his new girlfriend of a few months no one would bat an eye.
Anonymous's picture

J-LO USE EVERY MAN SHE DATE.

J-LO USE EVERY MAN SHE DATE. IF U GUY LOOK HER RECORD AFTER SHE USE THAT NEW DUDE SHE GONNO DUMP HIM AND GET BF NUMBER 8 PPL WATCHING EVERYBODY KNEW THE GUY SHE REALLY WANT IS DIDDY BUT SHE CAN'T HAVE HIM NOW CUZ DIDDY IS WITH CASSIE NOW AND DIDDY MOM WOULD NOT GONNO WELCOME J-LO IN COMB FAMILY AGAIN CUZ WHAT SHE DO TO PUFF IN THE PASS.
ght's picture

WOW...Im laughing at most of

WOW...Im laughing at most of these post...who are you people?? a bunch of young kids or over 30 mad/jealous/judgemental folk!! who the hell cares?? Do you really think the kids will remember a guy who they went to the beach with when they were 3??? plus we really don't know the details of the divorce or how long JLo and Marc Anthony have truly been apart. They could have been apart a year or more but due to "keeping up the appearances" they acted as if they were together....let GROWN FOLK WHO PAY THEIR OWN BILLS BE....knock off losers....wtf cares except people with no lives who sit behind a computer and judge folk they really don't know...
heisafool's picture

PREACH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DAMN I

PREACH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DAMN I CAN HERE HOW HARD YOU HIT THOSE KEYS...LMFAO
Anonymous's picture

So J.Lo needs to slow down

So J.Lo needs to slow down when it comes to her kids. I have 2 kids and am only 21 but I know better then to have my children around some man I'm dating. Personally I think 6 or months in is an appropriate time to introduce kids. Especially with a little girl , I have girls and I wouldn't dare put my kids in this type of situation so soon . But we have to remember we are on the outside looking in , we don't know how long they've been dating granted I still don't think its much longer then what we suspect STILL we don't know . He could very well be the cause for the divorce yu know ? At any rate its definitely too soon to be vacaying with him PUBLICLY and having those babies around him . her need and want to be loved is clouding her judgment as a mother .
Ashley's picture

A picture is worth a thousand

A picture is worth a thousand words, and the one w/ her toyfriend playing w/ her child in the water says it ALL! She looks like she just decided that...maybe it WAS too early to introduce the kids. "You gon' learn today!"#kevinhartsdad
Anonymous's picture

He looks like a total

He looks like a total attention seeking A hole and shes just jenny from da block....das how dey do..
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YONNE's picture

The best thing that has

The best thing that has happen to Puff is broke up between him and J-LO today diddy would thank god it doesn't worked out between them. she liked someone she can't control, i think she knew she can't control puff that's why she let him.
lohg's picture

Its known that J-Lo can't be

Its known that J-Lo can't be alone after a break up...Its really not a surprise. She needs help, mental help that is....
Anonymous's picture

Well with the prevalence of

Well with the prevalence of pedophiles in society and men seeking out single women with children just so they can abuse their children, I'd say single mothers should wait a very long time before introducing their romantic partners to their children.
Mabel's picture

Just because this news is

Just because this news is "new" to us doesn't mean it's new to her kids....ijs
Anonymous's picture

Just because this news is

Just because this news is "new" to us doesn't mean it's new to her kids....ijs
Anonymous's picture

Just because this news is

Just because this news is "new" to us doesn't mean it's new to her kids....ijs
Anonymous's picture

Tasha ,kids need to see life

Tasha ,kids need to see life being lived they need to know how to move forward after hurt or devastation,if this was marc anthony there would be no questions being asked!!! as a single mother i see nothing wrong with it, my kids are aware tht i have friends, no one is an uncle, only moms frien, and every thing is done with respect n dignity, but t the end of the day, mama has a lie to! so work it JLO!!!!
TRUESHANDA's picture

I appreciate your honesty.

I appreciate your honesty. Put as a woman who grew up with a mother who paraded various men in and out the house...........it is not healthy nor is it the right mindset that you want to put a child through. Children need stability. I would have loved to had said that, "me and my dad did ......" not "on monday Tom took me to the Disney Store and Friday Steve, my mama's other FRIEND took me to the carnival." Sure you have a life but do your children HAVE TO SEE IT?
anonymous's picture

I am glad you shared this.

I am glad you shared this. Most people don't look at it from the child's perspective. Children deserve to have someone looking out for them in these situations.
CJ's picture

Oh Gosh...K-Fed part "deux".

Oh Gosh...K-Fed part "deux".
GothamCityDiva's picture

Here we go beating up single

Here we go beating up single mothers again.
Anonymous's picture

i know right and most of the

i know right and most of the folks giving advice don't have kids or a man,and it will be a different story if they ever have to cross that bridge.you live and you learn not to judge. people who are always judging are immature. because grown people realize no one is perfect.and there is no guidbook to life.the story claims she had other family members there so it's not like they took them on a date or he is their new dad.
Anonymous's picture

A single woman should

A single woman should introduce her new boyfriend to her children, when she is good and ready. It is nobody's business but hers.
Anonymous's picture

So happy to see this

So happy to see this masculine looking tramp fail in three marriages she has always been a self-absorbed bitch. Look she is losing her thin hair so funny.
Dayanara Torres's picture

Okay-LOL!

Okay-LOL!
Anonymous's picture

Lopez looks like a man in the

Lopez looks like a man in the face she has a receding hairline and a big nose.
Oxamara Garcia's picture

And you are probably a dark

And you are probably a dark skinned, nappy haired man face Puerto Rican who looks like Lala Vasquez and Evelyn Lozado! Your types always hate on light skinned Boricuas because you are jealous and ugly.
Maria Vaara's picture

just like yo mama hunh?

just like yo mama hunh?
anonymous's picture

I'm not j-lo fan but i feel

I'm not j-lo fan but i feel sorry for her she just dump skeletor Mark Anthony now she with 24 years old dancer in second time again. Puff is somewhere now next to Cassie and laugh all day
lKIM's picture

meanwhile Cassie is crying

meanwhile Cassie is crying cause she has to fondle some tinseled haired nutz to remain relevant.
anonymous's picture

j-lo too had sex tape nake

j-lo too had sex tape nake picture
lKIM's picture

JLO is such a slut and a

JLO is such a slut and a nasty homewrecker. Now she is chasing after boys young enough to be her son because she can't even hold on to a Crackhead like Marc Anthony. There was no way Ben Affleck or Bradley Cooper was going to marry her they didn't want a stupid, big butt, ghetto POOR-HOE-REEK-(garbage)Can wife like her they only wanted beautiful white women with morals. Also, JLO'S daughter Emme looks like a Rhesus Monkey. Jennifer Garner is beautiful!!!
Oxamara Garcia's picture

and u could be proud of

and u could be proud of yourself.u have so much going for yorself.you have a way more interesting life than jlo and ur so confident.it really shows..lmao
Anonymous's picture

Why is Jennifer Lopez

Why is Jennifer Lopez featured on this site?
Anonymous's picture

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